3.4 Part Two: Performances and Love

"Camille, our mother, was to many people a great football player with a good heart. Those of us who knew her best can say she was a great mom with a big heart and a love for cooking. She loved us all a great deal and made a big thing out of getting up early and making breakfast for us all every morning. It meant the world to us. We have a lot of good memories of her, and" I tried not to cry as i held my speech at my mother's funeral. "She was a good woman, a great friend, and an even better mother."
I ended my speech and got down from the podium for the priest to take over.
I was glad to see Isaack among the guests. After the ceremony he came over and hugged me. I let myself cry on  his shoulder and he comforted me by rocking me back and forth and saying everything would be okay. He was here for me.
As she was laid in the ground i withstood the urge to jump down and be buried with her. We all took in turn to throw dirt on the casket. Afterwards we all back to my house to eat the food i had catered, as the gravedigger finished covering the casket with dirt.
"I'm so sorry for your loss," was, i found out, the most common phrase at a funeral. Ian kept himself in the background as usual. He wasn't shy or a loner, but for some reason he had grown to dislike crowds or just people in general. I had to pull him out of this loneliness somehow. But i couldn't focus on that right now. I had guests to entertain.

I had locked myself in my bedroom for days now, only to come out to eat or go to the bathroom. Ian had tried pulling me out of there several times. "Bea you need to come out. People are counting on you. I don't want to have to admit it, but i need your help with money. And," i raised myself on my arms as i heard a bark at the door. "Lulu misses you. She needs her mommy." It was very uncharacteristic of Ian to worry like that, at least i thought it was. It was hard to get inside his head.
He was right. I couldn't carry on like this. As head of the household i had responsibilities to take care of my family. I slowly got out of bed and got dressed.
I opened the door to find both Ian and Lulu standing there waiting for me. "Good job Bea. Now lets get down stairs and make dinner."
Was it dinner time already? Good god, i had slept all day.
"It's fine, i'll do it." I said, knowing he would just screw it up. He had definitely not inherited our mother's ability to cook. I made us some Mac and Cheese and we sat down to eat together.
"Are you over it already?" I asked, looking up from my meal.
He first looked up at me, then down saying: "No, but i think i handle it better than you. You haven't been out of the house in days. You need to see other people. That boyfriend of yours has been calling for you for the last couple of days none stop."
"He's not my boyfriend."
"My point is people care about you and you're just ignoring them. Maybe we should have a party, to gather everyone important to us."
"No thank you. I don't want a pity party. I just have to get out and perform again. It's the only way."
We ate the rest of the meal in silence as darkness fell upon the city outside. Afterwards we sat together in the living room watching the local news tv. I had missed a lot during the last few days of my solitude.

The next day i went down to the park where there were held the annual Summer Festival, to watch the singers of the town perform.

It was a great show. It made me want to perform even more. To become the greatest singer of them all. I wanted fame and fortune, and i knew there were only one way of getting it - hard work. I started doing sing-a-grams again, now for better pay every time. It was all a way for me to get over the death of my mother.

Then one night i thought enough was enough. I wanted Isaack and he was not going to get away. I knew he was single and i knew i was the right girl for him, he just didn't know it yet. So i asked him out to watch a show downtown. As the show ended i felt an urge to cry, to just let it all out. He must have noticed the tear that fell down my cheek, as he pulled me into a hug and i cried on his shoulder.

I looked up into  his eyes and out of the blue i just kissed him.

As our lips parted he whispered to me "Bea. My lovely Bea," and kissed me again with great passion.
We spend the rest of the night together under the stars, just talking about this and that.

When it was time to go home he asked me to go steady with him and I happily accepted. Now i had everything i wanted.

A few nights later he asked me out on our first real date. First we went to the local karaoke bar to sing romantic songs together.

After a few drinks at the bar we went to the diner next door to have a late dinner. I invited him back to my house where we made sweet love all night.

We slept until 3 o'clock in the afternoon where i stood up and got ready for my big gig later that evening. Isaack had to work so he could unfortunately not make it that night, but Ian showed up to support me and it meant the world to me.

At the show Ian met Chen Tai. She was a tourist from China. They ended up talking quite a while and when young Maria Best decided to try out the karaoke machine, they danced together like they had known each other forever.

A couple months later on a Monday morning my agent called me up and said i had a gig that very night at Flying V's Coffeehouse. Apparently they loved my last performance there and they wanted to hire me again as the evenings entertainment.
"That's great honey," Isaack said as we laid in bed together. "It won't be long before you are rich and famous."
"I don't know. I want this so bad, but sometimes i feel i'm not good enough. What if people don't like me? What if they are just pretending to like me so they won't hurt my feelings?"
"What if, what if... you can't live your life on a "what if". I'm sure they all love you. Why would they spend money on hiring you if they didn't like you? Listen to me good, you are a great performer. And i love to see you perform." He looked deep into my eyes. "I love you," he said without hesitation. Then i knew i could do anything as long as i had him by my side. "I love you too," I said completely truthful.